Chapter 3- Trinity

Damien would go to ground now, and I would be left with my thoughts, a chance to finally look back on everything that had gone on, and a chance to wallow in my own misfortune. I walked outside to walk around the gardens after I left Damien. Among the deep purple and black roses that made up the center of the garden, there was a hidden bench. If it were a different time, one might picture this as a lover’s bench, but for me it was simply a place to get away from the stress of who and what I was and deal with emotions that most Vampires couldn’t begin to feel.

I think I might be the only Vampire with a conscience. I still cannot tell if it’s a good thing or a bad thing and I am over 1,000 years old. Since my creation, I have seen more destruction and pain than I thought was possible, some of it at the hands of my people, and some of it at the hands of the humans. Over the years we were together, I had always been jealous of Jonathan’s Viking ability to accept the destruction and at times even joining in the desecration.

Even now, nearly 900 years after he left, everything came back to Jonathan. But for me, how could it not? He was six feet five inches of heaven. He was created in the time of Vikings, and used to wear his long blonde hair pulled back at the nape of his neck, but in recent centuries cut it short to where he could toss his head to the side and his hair would look as if he spent decades on it. I also found his blue eyes the most striking part of him, the way they looked like the ocean would look if you cut a piece of ice so thin it was transparent. There was a frostiness to him that everyone else felt. He could be cold and heartless one moment but passionate and warm the next. In a world where he was a warlord, that worked, but in a position of my consort, that would never be acceptable.

I tried with all my inner strength to not think about Jonathan, but his recent arrival in my castle prompted me to remember what things used to be like. Jonathan’s words rang true in my head, we had been created for each other, but I couldn’t justify staying with him for that reason alone, or even for the sole reason that I loved him.

About 1,500 years ago, a group of Vampire men came together and realized that their race needed to be organized and led by one head. Vampires were the elite race, and would forever be the elite race but they could fall at any given moment if they were not carefully organized and disciplined. After long discussions with the elders of the time, and most every Vampire, my “fathers” decided to create me. I became the product of advanced scientific (humans still don’t understand this form of science) research and experimentation. In 500 years, the Elders had created the most elite, powerful, intense Vampire to ever walk the night. Over the years, I have gained more power, more strength and more insight.

Jonathan’s story is different than mine. A rogue Vampire Elder turned Jonathan when he heard of what my “fathers” were creating, as a way to preserve the fierce spirit that was a Viking, and as a counterpart to the woman ruler. When he brought Jonathan to my “fathers,” they realized that this Elder was correct in thinking that I needed someone to be my support, someone to assist me in the immense job I had before me, eternally.

For the next 100 years, Jonathan and I could not be happier, and we fell deeply in love. He was my rock, my protection and my life. With him by my side, we were able to bring the entire race together and under one rule. We established the sheriffs, heads of states, councils and the High Council. Jonathan was my warrior, he was the first in a fight and the last one to end one. I loved Jonathan for the complex man he was, for his ability to leave more human emotions aside and for the way that he continued to challenge me both emotionally, intellectually. We were passionate together, and passionate about everything. He was the only other Vampire I knew that could also walk in the day, and together we traveled, we stayed home, we made love, we fought, we trained, we planned, we did it all. Where the lines were drawn though, where someone explained to him what I was, I had no clue, and that was led to our ruin.

As in love as we were, Jonathan needed to be able to roam, he needed to be able to hunt, and he needed to be accountable to only himself. I obviously held him back, and it was 900 years ago that we had the moments that ended everything, and I still remembered every word.

“Trinity. I’m leaving.” Jonathan walked into my office one evening, three words that shattered my world.

“Excuse me?”

“I cannot do this anymore Trinity. I need to be on my own, I cannot continue to live my life under your hand, as your second hand man. I need to be able to roam on my own. Your castle is confining.”

“Jonathan.”

“I love you Trinity. I truly do love you, and I will love you until I meet my final death, but this is asking too much of me.”

“You were going to be named my consort Jonathan…”

“You will find someone else Trinity, I know you will. But I need to go.”

“Why now Jonathan? Why not earlier? What is her name?”

“Trinity. You are my life, and you will always be my life, but I need to…” Jonathan searched for the words, he face clear and unmoved.

“You need to go grow up Jonathan. This is my life. I will not find another Vampire who will fill your void.” I tired to be strong and to hurt him as much as he was hurting me.

“You’re right Trinity, I do need to grow up, and I do not wish to do that while under your thumb. Good Bye.” Jonathan turned on his heels and walked out of my office, and out of my life.

Mike, my confidant walked in after him, “What the hell was that?”

“I’m not really sure Michael. Jonathan left, as is his right, but it is his choice. Nothing changes here Michael.” As I spoke I noticed that he thought that I needed something else from him but I sent him away with a curt nod.

Back in reality, I winced as the moment came back to me. I was ruined for fifty years after that. It took nearly 150 years once Jonathan walked out to find Damien. Things with Damien weren’t always good either. Damien seemed to keep the human emotion of envy and at times it came out in full force. He was a wonderful protector, and had earned the title of Protection, but he was no consort. I loved Damien, I truly did, but our relationship lacked something Jonathan and I always knew.

However, Damien was the more practical of the two, Damien was reliable and trustworthy; he had never once left my side. Unlike Jonathan, Damien sought only to keep the race peaceful and me safe. He was there no matter what was going on, Damien was true and unfaltering. But then there was Jonathan, a Viking, a warlord; he was sexy and mysterious, complicated and simplistic. Jonathan was the only partner who ever matched me intellectually and he was equally as passionate about life as I was. Somewhere underneath his cold exterior was the man that I loved, the one who would lay his life on the line for me.

I rose from the bench, shaking my head as if to rid my mind of all these lover’s worries. I checked my watch to see that there were only a few hours left until sundown. Knowing that the night would be a long one of meetings and discussions, I wandered back to my bedroom and curled up in my four-poster bed draped in sheer black fabric. I closed my eyes as I lay against the dark purple pillow case and fell into a dead sleep.